My Toddler Suddenly Hates Grandma: Why & How To Solve It?

When your toddler suddenly hates grandma, you will feel heartbroken and a bit angry. Yet, the first thing you should do is to stay calm and learn why this problem happens.

After identifying the root causes, you may know how to make your baby love its grandma as before.

Keep reading this article for further details!

Toddler Suddenly Hates Grandma: Why?

toddler suddenly hates grandma

Your baby’s dislike for grandma may be due to the gap between divergent personalities and routine disruption.

Besides, if your toddlers become independent, they are afraid of grandma’s scolding, or the negative experiences about grandma also make them hate her.

Not Acquainted with Grandma

A grandchild doesn’t like grandma due to the discomfort with strangers.

When grandma doesn’t spend enough time with a toddler, she immediately becomes a stranger, making the child feel fear and dislike.

This stranger anxiety is completely normal for a baby.

If grandma doesn’t often meet, talk, or play with toddlers, she can make the child feel unsafe and refuse to communicate.

In this case, give your kid plenty of time to gradually adjust the behavior and build connections.

The Gap Of Different Personalities

Seeking harmony between grandma and your toddler may be difficult due to the gap between divergent personalities.

Your child may be friendly and energetic, while grandma is often reserved and calm.

This leads to conflicts and causes challenges in developing and building relationships between grandma and your toddler. 

Suddenly Change Smell Or Voice

The voice or smell of grandma changing is one of the main reasons toddlers hate grandma and not be ready to connect with her in daily activities.

If grandma has a weird smell, such as new perfume, she can make the baby dislike it. Also, she will scare the toddler when speaking louder than normal.

Routine Disruption

Why is a 2-year-old mean to grandma? The routine disruption may lead to changing behavior in a toddler when meeting or connecting with grandma.

The behavior change often originates from sudden, everyday disorders such as starting daycare, moving to another home, and the new sibling’s arrival.

Thus, maintaining a consistent routine is necessary to help your toddler keep a close relationship with grandma.

Toddler’s Independence

When toddlers love their independence and discover their preferences, they suddenly dislike grandma.

This will make children distance themselves from grandma, one of their familiar persons.

Your baby aims to have freedom and display the independence badge. This may make them less fond of grandma’s assistance.

Thus, it may not be OK if you leave your baby with grandparents, especially grandmother. 

Unpleasant Experiences About Grandma

Another reason a 4-year-old doesn’t like grandma is the unpleasant experiences, such as stressful feelings and negative events.

Besides, if grandma gives your children terrible emotions or unhappy incidents, it causes changes in their behavior.

Afraid of Grandma’s Scolding

Grandma may be strict, so she is often angry and annoyed when a toddler doesn’t obey, throws toys anywhere in the home, or seems stubborn.

Sometimes, grandma also scolds and controls toddlers, making them feel uncomfortable and hate her.

What Should You Do If Your Toddler Suddenly Hates Grandma?

What Should You Do If Your Toddler Suddenly Hates Grandma

Help Your Toddler Build A Relationship With Grandma

One simple solution you should do is to support your toddler in rebuilding a close relationship with grandma.

First, you may reintroduce grandma and help her understand more about the toddler’s preferences or personalities.

You may nurture the relationship and boost the connection between grandma and your child by organizing daily activities, including large motor activities or special occasions.

Besides, create favorable conditions and a good environment for grandma to play and talk with your baby regularly.

Talk With Grandma

Discuss with grandma what is occurring and sudden changes in toddlers. When she understands, she may know how to reconnect with your baby.

Also, tell her how to calm fearful toddlers to help them regain loving emotion and confidence.

Understand and Empathize Your Baby

You may understand the toddler’s feelings by sharing and listening to your child’s wants. In addition, don’t force the kid to love or spend time to connect with grandma right away.

This may lead to further hatred towards grandma. Instead, empathize and give your baby the necessary time and space to change the behavior and thoughts about grandma.

Share Common Interests Between Grandma and Toddler

Sharing common interests between toddlers and grandma is useful to narrow the gap between distinct personalities and create positive experiences.

Doing so can build a close relationship, even making the child not hate grandma anymore.

Thus, encourage grandma to share her similar interests with the grandchild, such as reading books, going for walks, playing sports, or watching television.

Explain Grandma’s Role

A 3-year-old doesn’t like grandma when they don’t know how important she is in their lives.

Thus, you need to explain grandma’s role in caring and loving children to help them understand and behave correctly.

Integrate Grandma in Daily Routines

Grandma may join in daily routines, such as preparing favorite snacks for your baby or reading interesting bedtime stories.

The grandma’s presence into your children’s daily routines creates a comfortable and familiar environment to foster the bonds to become stronger and better.

Foster Friendly Communication and Environment

Building a friendly environment and maintaining positive communication between grandma and children is great.

Help your child engage with the grandma to avoid negative emotions and tension.

Look For Professional Support

It’s helpful to look for advice or support from experts, such as child psychologists or pediatricians, about the abnormal behavior of a toddler towards its grandma.

They can help you analyze the kid’s psychology and behavior and provide additional insight and effective strategies to deal with situations without difficulty.


3-year-old doesn't like grandma

Toddler Pushes Away Grandma – Why?

This is because your baby feels unsafe when being close to grandma. When your toddlers push away grandma, they don’t feel love and a close relationship with her.

Why Baby Cries When Grandma Holds Her?

Toddlers can cry because they are not familiar with grandma. They also cry when grandma holds them in the wrong way with an uncomfortable and unsafe grip or pose.


When your toddler suddenly hates grandma, consider the above-mentioned reasons. You can feel bewildered and challenged when discovering your baby dislikes grandma.

Yet, apply the useful strategies described in this article to rebuild and nurture their good relationship.

Try to understand your toddler to foster positive connections, open interesting communication, and integrate grandma into daily life.

Besides, be patient to help your toddler find the important role of grandma and gradually like her again.

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